What the Hell is Wrong with People?

 
  Every morning I awake to the morning news and most of the time it is shocking. Headlines read: Students shoots classmates, unknown causalities. Mother kills children. Husband kills wife and children. Soldier kills innocent children and civilians and burns them. 5 killed in car crash. I could go on but what is the point? Stress and despair invade people's mind and has them believing that all of this is real and matters. Bills and material things are not what matter in life. What you drive, where you live, where you work and who you are paired up with have no real bearing on your life. Your relationship with God is all that matters! All the things we have are just fillers to keep the mind occupied but these things are not important. We have let society tell us, we need to have 2.5 kids, a home, a career, an education and a 401k plan. Women are under pressure to be 10 million things that have very little to do with womanhood. Be thin, be rich, be a housewife, be a mother, be submissive, be assertive, be independent, be nice, be quiet, NO JUST BE! Young people are literally killing themselves because they do not have what they think they should have. Men are under pressure too. Men are supposed to provide, protect, and produce. Society wants them to be tough, but sensitive, assertive but nice, generous but not a push over. Men are expected to settle down and have a family all the while other women are throwing themselves at them at all times. They have to be strong and not show emotion. But when they show no emotion they are accused of being cold. Life has me so confused I could scream.

  The time has come to get back to where we started from. I grew up with two God fearing parents who taught me morals, values, and overall self-esteem. I have noticed many people lack these qualities. If you have morals there are certain things you will not do. If core values are instilled, you will think before you portray unethical behavior that may ruin your life. When a person has self-esteem they value themselves as well as others. I challenge all who read this post to make a conscious effort to do better. As a society we have to do better, we are becoming the "they" we talk about. The rude, self-centered, crazy, ignorant, selfish, lying, stealing, killing people we read about it in Tweets and Facebook posts. The fools we see on the news at night are us. The only way things can change is if we change. We are the people arguing over dumb shit and making enemies for nothing. We all need to check ourselves and come together because "we are all we got!"
PROCEED WITH CAUTION!

I Still Miss Him...

As my niece, Tiffany and my nephew, Frandon celebrate milestone birthdays I am reminded of another important date, the death of my father. Finniel Davidson died on his favorite grandson's birthday. January 8th, 1988, I was fifteen years old and had no clue what death is, an infinite closed door that can never be opened. I miss him more now than I did as a child. He was very strict and had very high expectations of me which I had no desire to live up to. I could have never stayed on his pedestal so God let me off the hook. He took him so he wouldn't have to witness my growing pains and terrible decisions. He was saved from watching me party my youth away, without ever considering a day like today. As I enter the third quarter of my life, I realize that if I only live as long as my father, I have 17 years left, that is like 17 days. Reading the posts on FB lately hell it might be less than 17 years. (I'm getting side tracked)

  My father was many things. He was raised in the deep south in the 1930's times were extremely hard. He never talked about his pass, but I know enough about history to know that a mixed raced family in the rural south had a hard way to go. He escaped the south and drove to California with his sister in the 1960's. He found love in 1970 and married my mom two months later. Within 17 years he was dead. He had very little education but managed to take care of his family, own his own business, drink like a fish and smoke like a chimney. Family was everything to him. If me and my mom were happy, then the world was perfect. I feel sad for women who have never had the adoration of their father. It builds an esteem in you that no man can ever destroy. My dad instilled this arrogance and attitude in me. He told me daily how smart and beautiful I am. I know at times it has been to a fault but I am a better woman for it. The lessons my father taught me angered me as a child. Grabbing switches from a tree to get a whipping would be labeled abuse today but then it was a deterrent from getting in trouble. He taught me my first timetable 6X6=36, he taught me to plant food, he showed me the type of man I wanted and the type I did not want, he taught me how to make pancakes, and he showed me how to make it happen. He had so many sayings, of course I didn't understand then but I do now. I know that his death saved me, I know he has been my guardian angel for all these years. I have been places I had no business, I have seen things I should not have seen and I am still standing. I just wish he could be here to see the woman I am. Sometimes the day passes without me really thinking of it but this year is different. I miss him so much today. I wish he could see my baby, she doesn't have the grandfather experience, I didn't have it either. There are so many questions I didn't ask him, so many things I would tell him......the main thing I want to say is, THANK YOU, DADDY  LOVE YOU! ALL DAYS ALL WAYS

We All Have to Die, but Why?

John Atterberry has broken my silence. My close friends and family know how passionate I am about the people I care for.The tragic and senseless murder of a man I have known well over twenty years, has me angry,confused and hurt. John Atterberry from all accounts was a handsome, intelligent, driven, successful man with a great deal of life to live; when a hopeless and weak young man decided he could not go on with his life destroyed John's life. John proved to himself and his peers that he could survive and strive to be the best. Although he had many personal hurdles he did not allow them to change who he was. He was always jovial. I cannot remember him in a bad mood or without a smile on his face. At times he would get on my nerves playing so much when we were kids. But as a man I was more than impressed with the man he developed into. This is not my eulogy of John, I am getting to a point, sorry. I have mentioned my anger regarding my friends death. I am hurt...not because I do not realize none of us are here permanently, but because I wanted to watch him shine! When people die, they leave us here. They go off to a new adventure and leave us here to pick up the pieces they leave behind. When he rushed out, his bed may not have been made, or his dishes were in the sink someone put them away. He may have working on a project that needs his approval or maybe he started a script. Now all those things cannot be completed by him. Tragedy strikes without rhyme or reason, we can only react after he strikes. Prayer and forgiveness are always on the list of things to do, but we all prayed but none of us received the answer we wanted. God knows best, but it's days like this when my faith is truly tested. This feels like a mistake, what possible good could come from such a senseless and devastating act of cowardice?

Unlike John, the shooter did not have hundreds if not thousands of people who loved and respected him. He had not lived long enough to know that the girl was the first in a long list of people who don't want you when your young but catch the "vapors" when you get your shit together like John did. See the sad thing is when you are young you do a bunch of dumb shit you wish you could take back, but this dummy took my friend's life. Every time I loose someone a piece of me goes with them, a laugh I will never share again or a hug from an old friend. John you are not the first but you are the latest on my list of loved ones I wish could have stayed a little while longer. R.I.P JOHN ATTERBERRY 6/11/71-12/11/11

Hate on You? Who Are You?

  Hater...I am so tired of the noun. Hate is such a strong word and takes so much pain staking energy to muster up. In this new Hip Hop generation the term is used by people who most of us do not acknowledge, let alone have time hate. I hear children saying it. I hear teenagers saying it. Girls with no jobs, education or financial status are saying people are haters. I hear guys who live with their parents and they have children saying people are hating on them. I hear immature women who get paid to make a fool of them selves on fictitious reality television shows saying the other immature women are hating on them. I hear senior citizens using the term now. How far will this foolishness go? Rhetorical question of course, but for anyone who may think I personally am a hater because I tend to speak about things that annoy me or issues I feel need to be addressed let me assure I have no time, energy or desire to hate on you. Who are you? If you have time to stop and worry about who is saying what about you, you may not be using your time wisely. People who have their lives together are too busy keeping their life on track to sit up and tweet, Facebook update, beebo, email or call people to hate on  you. 

If you are wondering why I feel so passionately about this, I am a Twitter subscriber. I am attempting to promote my blog and get information on what is going on in the world. I follow all sorts of people. Most people I follow on twitter are positive. But a few of them are completely consumed with the people they perceive are hate them. I get so sick of the reteets and status updates on Facebook about haters. I may be wrong but most of the time people are just talking, they don't give a shit about you and what you have, what you drive, where you live or who you sleep with. It's just conversation that is a diversion from their lives and all the issues they have going on. I replied to a tweet that @EvelynLozada Basketball Wive posted about some girl @ShaniceH being a "Hater" below is a copy of my tweet.

YD_Reigns Y.D.Carter

@

@EvelynLozada @ochocinco @ShanieceH You kill me with Hater, expand your vocabulary like @Roycelr said last yr.#nooneishating

EvelynLozada Evelyn Lozada

Fuck u (is that better)? RT @YD_Reigns: @EvelynLozada @ochocinco @ShanieceH You kill me with Hater, expand your vocabulary

I think it is funny how just the mere mention of self improvement sent her over the edge. She doesn't know me but what if I were crazy and punched in the mouth if I saw her at the mall? I am an adult now and do not behave in that matter but if this were ten or fifteen years ago it would be my life's mission to show her how 78th street girls really get down. Thank God for deliverance from foolishness. The point of this post is to point out how petty we can be as humans and how we need to uplift instead of tear down. Now I would be lying if I said there was not personal ambition behind the tweet, she has over six hundred thousand followers and she mentioned me. This blog will get traffic and succeed. I am on another level right now like Outkast. As usual I am always willing to articulate what people think privately. Take it from a woman who has seen and done things that many people on dream of. The triumph in life comes from loving yourself, not loving what you have. $1000 shoes cannot take you down the right road. They only make someone else wealthy. A $250,000 car cannot drive you to your final destination.(Heaven or Hell) We need to unite and stop fighting! Love yourself and love someone else along the way. 

PROCEED WITH CAUTION

10 Things People Do to Ruin Their Lives

     Everyone has advice of what you should do for a happy life. I cannot tell you what you do to be happy, but I can tell you what to do if you want to ruin your life. 

1. Fall in love with the wrong person. People loose decades of their lives in dead end relationships, simply because the person they fell in love with was wrong for them.
2. Do not get an education. If you desire a life filled with mediocrity and financial ruin this is one of the best ways to assure you have it your way.
3. Sleep around with strangers. A reputation as a promiscuous woman will take a lifetime to live down and could cost you your life if you happen to sleep with a killer or someone who has a deadly disease and passes it you.
4. Have kids by multiple people. Having a baby every two or three years for ten years will reserve your seat in misery. Your ex's may be cool but your child support payments and interaction with four or five different people with visitation schedules, play dates, sports and school will have you exhausted. You will also have a difficult time finding a meaningful relationship with all your baggage.
5. Commit a felony. Jobs are scarce for job seekers with clean records. Imagine how difficult it would be if you had to mark yes by the box for: have you ever been convicted of a felony? 
6. Become an Addict. Drug and alcohol abuse are a wonderful way to ruin relationships, loose jobs, impair your judgment and steer you down the road to an early grave. You can join a long list of well known people as well anonymous John and Jane Does downtown in the morgue. 
7. Tell Lies and Cheat. Nothing spells looser like liar. When no one believes you, your integrity is null. Cheaters are right up there with liars and thieves!
8. Stay in one place. Moving around and exploring new places allows a person to broaden his or her horizons. The environment you feel most comfortable most likely will stagnate your personal development. If you live in a depressed or distressed community, by all means stay there and fester in misery.
9. Do not take your health seriously. Ignore the Surgeon General and the American Cancer Society and smoke cigarettes. Loose at least ten years of your life and look older than your peers. Over eat and become obese. Don't exercise or go the doctor for regular check ups. I guarantee you will suffer the consequences.
10. Do not cultivate a relationship with God. Your spirit is the most essential part of you. A life without God is not life it is death! 

     Life is not about where you have been. Life is about where you are going. 

Use the GPS and choose which direction you want to go and bookmark the locations to stay away from.

PROCEED WITH CAUTION!